Dear Son

Some of you might remember that a few years ago I wrote a letter to my future daughter. Well today I was thinking about how often we see pieces of writing like this amongst women, yet there is little addressed to our sons. Journals and life lessons written for her, for one day, imparting our female knowledge for the next female generation are common. But what about the boys? Perhaps I won’t have a daughter, perhaps I’ll be a mother to sons and I happen to think that if that is in fact the case, that it will be just as important to divulge my feminine take on things as it would be if I’d had a daughter; perhaps even more so. Because to raise a son that understands and who has a rooted respect for women might possibly be the most important job of our lives.

So, to my son, if ever you should exist, this is for you…

Play a sport…

I say that not because you’re a boy and that is what boys do. I say it because it will teach you how to win honourably and lose gracefully, respect authority and work with others. Plus, it’s good to move!

Delayed gratification…

It’s good to want things in life. But it is important to learn to wait for them. Practice delayed gratification and I promise you will get not only what you want, but exactly what you need.

Make your bed…

Because if you can’t do the small things in life you’ll never be able to do the big things.

Keep on learning…

Your knowledge and education are something that nobody can take away from you. Never let anything or anyone get in the way of bettering yourself. Not even me.

Don’t forget to smile…

You’re alive, happy and healthy. Some people are not so lucky. Never compare your life to other peoples because you have no idea what their journey is all about and always remember you don’t own all the problems in the world, so show us that smile.

Be altruistic…

Treat everyone kindly because, it is right, not because there is something in it for you. Also try to remember that it is always better to be kind than to be right. That being said, never spend a second with somebody who doesn’t deserve your kindness.

Be strong and tender at the same time…

Because a real man isn’t afraid of his emotions. He can be both vulnerable and in charge all at once.

Remember you are loved…

If you decide that you want to live your life differently than me, if you decide that you want to pursue something that I forgot to encourage you to do. Remember this, I love you. I will love you no matter what. My love for you is not conditional, it is infinitely constant.

Believe in equality…

You’ll grow up hearing that a woman can do everything that you can do. This is not entirely true. What is true is that the things men can do and the things that women can do are equally valuable.

Peer pressure is a scary thing…

Be a good leader and others will follow.

Family is the most important thing in life…

If I’ve done my job right you’ll already know this. But should you ever forget, remember that no one in this world will have your back like us, so call your mother because I might be missing you.

And finally, always be a gentleman…

Even when it’s truly hard and testing remain a gentleman in both life and in love, and you will be successful in both departments.

Love your one-day Mum.