Sloth Plans

I’ve overcome my laziness to make more travel plans for this year. In August, I’ll be jetting off to Colombia to work with sloths in a rescue centre. By which I mean I’ll be looking after the sloths, not working alongside them. I have to pay the deposit by next week, then there’s no going back. When this post is posted there’s no going back, as I’m using it to blackmail myself into going. If I don’t, then my cowardice will be public knowledge.

Pride is a great tool for taking risks if you’re a wimp. If I tell everyone I’m going to Colombia to look after sloths then chicken out, the shame would be too much for my pride to bear. It makes the trip a reality, so whenever I plan a terrifying adventure I tell as many people as possible. My cowardly side can’t believe I’m doing this, just like it cried and begged me not to go to Thailand a few years ago. I’m throwing myself so far out of my comfort zone that I won’t be able to see it anymore. At most, my comfort zone will be a speck in the distance.

A whim took me to Thailand to look after rescued elephants, and now my listless mood is taking me to Colombia to look after rescued sloths. I have a soft spot for both species, and I can’t explain the extreme joy that fills me whenever I see a sloth either in person or picture. They’re just so smiley! Alright, maybe it’s because they’re cute. I’m just that shallow.

I haven’t even paid the deposit yet and already I feel better about myself. I think I’ve researched the company as much as I possibly can, and they seem legit. They’re part of the Globalteer community, which gives them more credibility, and I’ve checked and double checked everything I can about the centre. Last year, I nearly volunteered for an elephant rescue centre in Africa that allows visitors to ride the resident elephants there. That detail passed me by, but luckily my dad spotted it in his paranoid parent research. No matter how much a centre proclaims to treat their animals well, if they allow elephant rides then they’re lying through their teeth.

Maybe sloths are my spirit animal: lazy, so slow that algae grows on them, and live in constant terror of harpy eagles. Hey, if those birds can carry off sloths and monkeys then I won’t be a challenge for them.

I was going to visit Denmark, as I may have mentioned on a previous week. But whether Denmark is just expensive or this is a popular time of year, the cost of a hostel for a week would have been more than four weeks in Colombia. Why spend a week in Denmark when I can look after sloths for four weeks at a cheaper price? Denmark might be cheaper in the autumn or winter, and after a month of South America I might want to visit somewhere snowy.