Girl on girl hate is a major issue in every aspect of our lives – whether that’s in business, in school or on the internet. It’s an extremely damaging culture fuelled by insecurities and jealousy. Putting another girl down can, for some, increase their self-esteem and help them feel validated by society as a way of saying “look, this woman is not conforming and I’m calling it out because I would not do that, therefore I should be valued more than her”.
It’s this habit of competing against each other that has become the product of the male gaze – what men do and do not find attractive is forced upon us everywhere we go in advertisements, television, music and in the way men treat women in real life. By pointing out physical or emotional flaws in other women we are propelling the idea that we can and we should tell women who to be, and how to behave in order to be deemed attractive to men. My question is simply this, why is being attractive to men our ultimate goal, especially at the detriment to ourselves and each other?
At the end of last year Lilly Singh, the YouTube star also known as iisuperwomanii with over 9 million subscribers, posted a video promoting girl love, appreciation and acceptance. She asked a whole load of famous faces such as Shay Mitchell and fellow YouTuber Grace Helbig to speak candidly about the importance of spreading girl love and how we can help change this awful trend.
Lilly Singh, The Tonight Show
“[#GirlLove] is a cause I really believe in. It’s to tackle the cycle of girl-on-girl hate. The idea behind #GirlLove is to make it cool to compliment other women and build them up.” – Lilly Singh
Now 8 months later Lilly’s message is becoming a movement, with an Instagram account that has over 54 thousand followers willing to take a step towards loving, rather than hating each other; posting empowering messages as well as celebrating real life women and their achievements! #GirlLove also now has a section on Lilly’s YouTube channel, with their first episode featuring Mila Kunis, Kristen Bell and Kathryn Hahn of Bad Moms.
Spread Girl Love, Instagram
It seems Lilly is creating an army ready for war, however instead of weapons to tear people down, they carry empowering words to build each other up. Turning our jealousy into admiration and our competition into community.